Difference of opinion, especially in Marriage is quite inevitable. I have my fair share of struggling and juggling, everyday.You must be knowing that girls are programmed to talk more or atleast I talk nonstop. My husband listens to what I say first and then he listens and listens and then he listens.Did I say he listens...? I mean he listens to me a lot and seldom responds.
Since I dont give him more than 10 seconds to think of a reply , by the time he arrives at a reply I would have posed him 3 more questions.There again he listens only to listen again.Once, some friend of my husband told us of the book (u must be knowing the book )and advised us not to read the book unless we fear that things are really not gonna work the way it is. Also he meant that it is a bliss to be unaware of what may come upon the happy face of the marriage made in heaven.
Every time I sense a problem, a strange pattern of argument(speech) follows it and eventually, I give up struck dumb.Since I talk a lot , my silence is daunting to me ,more than anyone else.This book flashed on my mind and I thought why not give it a try, might be of some help. The book says if marriages are made in heaven, everything that follows sure is from hell and most of them are discussed in the book , like when you come home after an exhausted day at the office.what I inferred from the first few chapters I had read is If You both find yourself lost somewhere, your man never wants to discuss about it but is still working on it. And you stop him from working on it by discussing it nonstop, without actually working on it. I admit.The next time I feel anything brewing trouble,I was determined to keep quiet.
So it happened one saturday, we were heading for a shopping mall and lost the way when we were almost there.The book says, if I discuss with him, why we lost the way,it might upset him, even if we make it on time.Instead, If I dont, he might figure out on his own , maybe it takes another 10-15 minutes. By every nerve , I wanted to insist ,that he inquire of someone on the road to locate the mall but ,I kept quiet.And he kept his fingers crossed that he finds the way on his own but,in no minute , he pulled the car and sent me to ask the old lady across the road to locate the mall. It worked...!but the other way round. He talked and I listened to him.Hope you understand how trying was it for me to keep quiet for that one minute under pressure and for him, to break open his usual 'Mouna ragam'. So these days if I dont get a reply from him, I dont bug him with another bunch of questions.To my surprise, I notice he responds quickly, Touch wood! Please dont come to the conclusion that If u dont post a comment , I might stop publishing ;)